Comments on: Stagnant

By: sigh « At Longing’s End

*sigh* « At Longing’s End — Sun, 08 Feb 2009 06:11:19 +0000

[...] I am not. I am frightened that I am falling into that place I was not too long ago, when my sex drive was sucked away. It’s odd to me really. I spend [...]

By: ripples « At Longing’s End

ripples « At Longing’s End — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 02:23:20 +0000

[...] 23, 2008 by Mina I came home Monday, after having written my stagnant post and emailing it to Sylvanus. He took me into the bedroom and sat on the bed. He held my hands as I [...]

By: Eyes

Eyes — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 23:13:57 +0000

you keep on doin what you’re doin you keep on gettin what you’re gettin

I think the submissive thing is a man play, just me sayin’

I rough my girl up….but she ain’t submissive, she just likes it rough

By: ankarasgirl

ankarasgirl — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 12:10:14 +0000

I was going to start out by saying “oh yes, naturally submissive women roll their eyes at rules from time to time”. But then of course that is only my view and maybe I’m not a naturally submissive woman? Who knows. Who’s to say?

I do know that I have done it. I question things – to me that is being a “natural” human being. I have a lot of misgivings about submissives who would say they have never questioned a thing their Master has said/ordered.

My two cents — the journey is to find what works for you and Sylvanus. It isn’t to fit someone else’s mold of what works for them, that will never feel right. Just to complicate things, “what works” now is ever changing, just like we are as people.

By: Mr. Upton Ogood

Mr. Upton Ogood — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 03:53:42 +0000

B.B. King said that whenever he needed a new blues song, he’d break up with his current girlfriend. He’s been singin’ the blues for, what seems like, forever. I know. That seems extreme. But he just wants blues. You want excitement. Or, maybe, just the idea of it. Well…as an old guy, I can tell you that, no matter how hard you try, it isn’t always “blow jobs and butt fucking” ( a phrase I lifted from the lovely kaya_s).

Maybe, now that life is good, what you want to write about is what it is -now- rather than what it -might have been like- when you weren’t happy? I dunno… I’m just kickin’ a can here.

Sure..ladies are hostage to hormones…I’ve been to that rodeo too many times myself. But maybe, just maybe, there are things locked away that you’d never do…but always wondered about…things that you’re ashamed or embarassed about…maybe you want to pick at those scabs and see what crawls out…(uh…ok..poor chose of metaphor, but you see where I’m going, right?)

That’s all I have, off the top of my head. Maybe when I’m sober, I’ll have something better. Maybe.

Mr. Upton Ogood

ps…on re-reading your post…sated means never having to say “what’s next”. Are you sated? Stagnant is pretty close to what I look like, post-coital bliss, and also sounds like an odor I produce on warm Wednesdays…but that’s a glandular thing I think ;-)

Upton

By: Carrie Ann

Carrie Ann — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 19:13:23 +0000

I’m not sure how old you are, mina, but I’m going thru the loss of desire thing too.

For me it’s hormones.
I’m in my late thirties and starting perimenopause already.

Any chance your issue could be part hormonal?

Carrie
A View from the Floor

By: subheart

subheart — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 17:31:29 +0000

I know exactly how you feel. It takes some time to get to where it works. I am not very submissive outside of the bedroom either, and yes I roll my eyes too…lol
We have found that the “rules” that people follow and talk about online just dont work for us. We have made our own. D/s is what you make of it.
As for the sex drive, I’ve had none for the last 3 weeks. Its no big deal. It will come back. If I worry about it, it takes longer to get it back.
I do know that when I was taking antidepressants a few years back, I lost my sex drive for the whole time I took them. I get the same effect when I take strong painkillers.
Well, I hope you fell better soon.

By: Beth

Beth — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 15:57:21 +0000

Well, I can tell ya, as an innately submissive woman, that there are definitely times I roll my eyes at some of the rules! Not, mind you, that I don't take care to not let them know that! Writing: like any other creative endeavor, there is an ebb and flow to it. I've gone through periods in my life where I've written reams, and other times ... it has dried up completely. Sex drive: see above. Being D/s: apples and oranges, hon. Your relationship with Sylvanus is unique to the two of you. What works for other individuals and couples and triads and what-have-yous isn't necessarily right for the two of you. Take what works, let the rest go. Big, big {{hugs}} to you both.