Monday Moanings – kiss me

Hello and welcome back to Monday Moanings! First time here? Thanks for stopping by! I started Monday Moanings as a fun way to get some content on this blog, as well as improve the dreaded Monday for our readers/followers. 

Kiss me

During our last visit to the states, my husband and I received these lovely pillow cases. “Always kiss me goodnight”. I think it’s sweet advise for any couple out there. Never go to bed angry and always kiss each other goodnight. Unfortunately, you never know if you’ll see the light of day again once you close your eyes for slumber. Make every second count. 

*click*

So what do you say? Kiss me goodnight? Enjoy your Monday and be sure to come back again! xo mina 

© At Longings End 

Missed out on past #MondayMoanings? Visit them here. 

Rather skip straight to the gallery? Right over here. 

give me flesh

So, while having a conversation with my husband last night, I think I had a realization. First, let me back this up and give an example of what my realization is. 

When I met C via the internet, we did a lot of interacting through texts. We didn’t actually meet in person till at least a month after we “met” online. He was my Master and I his slave. To prepare me for our physical sessions, and also as a way to get to know each other as Master and slave, he would send me tasks to complete. These I happily did to the best of my ability. I found them all arousing and fun to do. Then, C and I met in person and our interactions were pure magic. Each time we met in person, our connection and actions became more intense. Suddenly, we came to the mutual agreement that sending me tasks to do on days that we were not together, just weren’t enough anymore. Asking me to belt myself for him, just was silly when there was so much more that can be accomplished in person. So the tasks stopped, with him realizing he would have to “up the game” a bit and focus on mindfucks more than physical tasks. We never got there unfortunately. 

So, here’s the information to walk away from this little example. Interacting in the digital realm just wasn’t as arousing anymore as the “real thing”. 

This, I find, can be applied to almost anything these days. I think I am finally moving on. Let me explain. 

I have been active on the internet socially now for about 5 years. Meaning, I have been blogging and interacting with people and now add to that, twitter. In the beginning, I flirted a lot with other people and found this quite arousing and fun. Then, as time passed, I found my tastes to become specific. These days, I still enjoy a good flirtation. 

When I met someone I liked, it was not uncommon for me to cyber or sext with them. After all, this was usually the only way we could have “sex” with each other. I found this extremely arousing. I enjoyed doing it with certain individuals I clicked with, not everyone. Sometimes, I’d take pictures for someone, or record a video for them . Videos were rare though. Even rarer would be the use of Skype. The person I have used Skype for sexy fun the most, has been my husband. He and I have used it together for sexy fun with someone else a few times. But, I think on my own, I can easily say I have only used Skype for sexy fun with maybe 2 or 3 people total. 

Since opening up our relationship, I now have the opportunity to meet people in the flesh. I have not really taken advantage of this very much. Mostly because I am so damn picky. Mostly also, because the only people I have been interested in seeing have been dominant men. It’s the only thing missing from my life. It’s my submissive side that is yearning to be fulfilled. This could very well be why I have not desired to seek out new lovers of the non dominant male type. My misguided attitude has been, I do not need a better lover, I am quite satisfied by the one I have married. But I suppose I am missing the point. It’s about being able to experience different lovers for the fun of it, not because they could satisfy me better or not. This is why I am trying to “loosen” up in 2012. I need to shed this desire to have a connection with someone and a “relationship” with someone and just have some fun. Sure, I still need to like someone a whole lot in order to sleep with them, but I’m not going to be so finicky about things. 

There’s a point to this post, I swear. 

I’m growing out of lust with the sexting, cybering and sex video chats. *GASP* I think mostly because the in-person interaction is so much more exciting. Sure, there are moments and days where I am in the mood and I have fun with it, but I think in general, it doesn’t really do it for me anymore. There are exceptions, of course. There are always individuals that break through that and grab my interest and have my attention. Admittedly, these individuals tend to be dominant men, because, remember, it’s my submissive side that screams for stimulation. But in general, sexting and cybering rarely does it for me any more. I think I have grown out of it. I think I am moving on. The novelty may have finally worn off after 5 years. 

Using Skype to have some sexy fun, runs hot and cold for me as well. Granted, I don’t have much experience with this. I have kept myself pretty picky about who sees me “live”. I enjoy using Skype as a way to talk to someone face to face over many miles and to get to know each other. This I like very much. I have found myself getting wrapped up in conversations for hours at a time. And, being someone who has moved internationally from all my friends, Skype is absolutely wonderful to stay in touch. However, when it comes to speaking with “sexy friends”, I find that I’m not getting much out of playing with myself for them. It’s not that I don’t enjoy it. I mean, if I’m playing with myself and giving myself an orgasm, that still feels really good, but if you gave me a choice between doing that or not, I’d most likely prefer not. I feel silly sometimes stripping naked and putting on a show. It just doesn’t arouse me. Which is odd, because it sure as hell arouses the other person watching me. So why am I not simply turned on because what I am doing is arousing the fuck out of the other person?!?

I guess simply put, it’s because we are not in the same room. There isn’t an interaction. Some would say, well, maybe it’s just the person you are talking to? Maybe you aren’t really into them? I have to disagree. If that person wanted to spend a night in the hotel with me, I would say yes without hesitation. I’m thinking of specific people here. I know we would have lots of fun in the hotel room together, but for whatever reason, sexting, cybering or having sexy fun via video chat, just doesn’t seem to do it for me anymore. Ok, to say it just doesn’t do it for me anymore would be a lie, because like I said, I still get into “moods”, but the majority of the time, I could take it or leave it. 

I guess the novelty is finally wearing off. I’m moving on and now interactions of the flesh excite me much more … 

© At Longings End 

Monday Moanings – back to class

Since it is a new year, I thought I’d try something new. Introducing “Monday Moanings”. Who likes Mondays anyway? Well, unless of course they happen to be your day off (like they once were for me years ago) but I digress. Since most people wake up on a Monday morning with the hatred of a new work week about to commence, I thought I’d add a touch of spice. I thought I’d add a touch of mina to get your day going.

I hope to keep up with Monday Moaning on a weekly basis. I think for the most part, MM will consist mostly of pictures, but who knows? Maybe I will throw in the occasional audio file, video or an erotic piece written just for you, but mostly pictures.. I promise. But here’s where you readers can help out. Be sure to leave a comment of what you like most as each Monday passes and I’ll always happily take requests. Now, on with the first moan!

Back to class! 

My German classes have been on holiday due to the, well, holidays. Tomorrow, it’s back to being the student for me, so I thought I’d crack open the books and refresh my memory. Oh my! It’s not only the books I seem to have cracked open! 

*click

Happy Monday Moaning to you! *kisses* -mina

© At Longings End

The Sex Radius

So, here’s a thought that came up in a conversation with Mina and I:

• How far would you travel for sex with an internet person? 

First of all, there are few basic assumptions. Firstly, you have flirted with this person long enough and intensely enough that you know there is definitely some good chemistry there, and you’ve traded enough pictures to know that they are physically attractive. Secondly, it will be, if it works out, at least an overnight visit – no dashes-for-quickies, where the length of time you will spend doing it starts to put limits on the travel.

When I put this out on Twitter to get some feedback, I got enough answers that I realize I need to break this down, because there are some important things that drastically affect people’s willingness to travel. Let me set out a few examples (all based on past personal experience of things I did or nearly did):

Example 1: You are in an unhappy situation; either you or single or in a sexually unsatisfying relationship. You are looking for someone new in your life and there is the potential for a lot more than just sex, but sex is very likely the immediate outcome.

One thing I noticed on Twitter responses was that almost every single case of truly spectacular travel involved a prospect of a major, committed relationship as well as the sex (which was, unsurprisingly, virtually assured). in fact, in this case, many people who might not even travel across their town will traverse huge swaths of the globe. Personal history: This is how I met Mina. I flew 1998 miles, or 5 hours. Granted, I officially flew for a job interview, and also met with her. She drove over three hours on the 405 (LA people explain to the rest just how horrifying that really is.)

Example 2: You are in a perfectly satisfying, but open relationship, and you have met someone that particularly strikes your fancy. 

Distances start shrinking really rapidly here. Personal history: Actually quite varied. I have met someone on the other side of the Atlantic, but I was back in the US for other reasons, and then, as a side trip, flew two hours out of my way to see someone that, although we definitely got along well, we were definitely meeting for sex. I have also had a case where I took a business trip four hours of town (by car), and chose to drive a further 4 hours (which turned out to be 6) away from home to see someone for a weekend. Unfortunately, the length and stress of the drive had some deleterious biological side effects on me, and by the time I was back home, I had resolved that I would definitely fly for the next time. Now, I find my limit is really about 2-3 hours.

What I also find that is really interesting is that, as I think about it, I get a feeling that I would fly about 2.5 hours. From Switzerland, that covers nearly all of Europe. But, I also travel frequently back to the US on business, either New York or Atlanta. I used Atlanta as my mental example, and I found that once the trip started getting over about 2.5 hours, it began to just feel excessive. Which would mean that I would do Atlanta-Chicago, but probably not Atlanta-Denver. This result I found really strange – I would definitely NOT fly to the Pacific coast from ATL, this just “felt” excessive. Granted, I was taking one of my favorite “special friends” as my example here, but I can also suppose that a specific person would push this boundary a bit. Also, the feeling that, on a given trip to the US, I might not have another chance might sway my thinking. 

One thing I would definitely NOT do is cross an ocean just for sex. Someone, this is an immense psychological barrier. If I fly the 8+ hours to meet a sex buddy, that would just feel incredibly excessive. I also note that virtually no person I know would let someone else, who not independently wealthy, buy them a transoceanic plane ticket. Using frequent flyer miles might be accepted, but a cash buy – no way. It is just an expenditure that seems like too much.

Example 3: You and the person agree to both hit the bricks and meet halfway. Only applies to cars.

One thing I find fascinating about this is that the shared sacrifice in both parties driving really makes people willing to go farther. I remember a near miss, one that was just outside the outer limit, and this was at 8 hours of road time. So, I would goes that here I would probably not do more than 7 hours. 

—

Here’s the other half of it: Suppose someone travels to you. How obliged do you feel based on the effort someone made to see you? Now, of course, we all know that sex is never guaranteed, but, let’s be realistic: If someone travels 8 hours on a plane to see you, and you don’t put out, that is going to be one hellaciously awkward weekend. Naturally, you do everything you can, but sometimes, in person, the chemistry just isn’t there. So, now you have a choice – a fantastically awkward weekend, or gritting your teeth, dropping trou, and throwing your best effort into something you don’t want to do and picturing the scalding hot shower that will wash this off, so that you spend a little less time wishing for it all to be over. How do those distances apply pressure? On one hand, you’d have no problem telling a guy from around the corner to go whack off, but how do you say that to a jet-lagged person who crossed six time zones to see…you? How is that going to play out?

—

What do you think? What I find interesting is the value I assign to sex, and the cost I assign to travel in my head. What does that say about me? (or you?)

Happy New Year

As you read this, Sylvanus and I have already kissed in the new year. I’ve lit the match, burned the bridge of 2011 and have taken the first steps to moving on. First item on the list, focus on the positives of the years passed and the future to come. 

2011 brought with it many new and exciting things between Sylvanus and I. We moved to Switzerland. Sure it’s not all glitter and glam, but wow, we live in Switzerland. We took a leap, left our comfortable life in the states and decided to try something new and different. We don’t plan on living the rest of our lives here. We just aren’t made for Swiss living, but we are certainly going to make the most of it while we can. 

2011 has been a year of growth between Sylvanus and myself. We’ve both had some extramarital encounters. Some worked out well, others, not so much. In the end, good or bad, we were always here for each other. That’s what matters most. At least for me. In the end, no matter what happens with another person, Sylvanus will always be my number one. He is going to be the one that is there when the others leave. He is the one that will be there to share in the joys of my successes. So, I look onward to 2012 in the hopes that it will continue to bring new and exciting lovers into our lives. Ones that will enrich us and strengthen us as a couple. Bring in the new year. 

My birthday in 2011, was during a trip to the states. My husband made sure it was a special day for me. We had a nice day, just he and I at the Aquarium with backstage passes and show tickets. Afterwards, we ate a fabulous chef’s tasting menu with wine pairings at an awesome local restaurant. Oh how I love that having Sylvanus in my life has also brought more decadent meals into it as well. He’s helped grow my dining pallet. I’ve eaten foods I would have not normally ordered thanks to him. I guess you could say I am growing up as a diner. 

Sylvanus’s birthday in 2011 found us in France in the Alsace wine region. We had a delicious lunch followed by a drive around the local wineries. At the end of the day, we came home with a trunk full of yummy wines. 

We went to Milan… Milan! Sylvanus, myself and the pup (yeah she’s a lucky dog and doesn’t know it) took a road trip down to Italy and visited Milan for a weekend. The sites were breathtaking and the food wonderful. On our trip back home, we made a detour and stopped in Bellagio. It was worth seeing the real Bellagio since we were married at the one in Vegas. 

We went to Paris for our second wedding anniversary! That’s right.. Paris. Really, doesn’t get any better than that. We had a room with a view of the Eiffel Tower. Heck, we could walk to the Eiffel Tower from our hotel and be there in under 10 minutes. We went to the Louvre, the Champs-Élysées, Arc de Triumph and many other touristy places. Our finest point however, was dinner at the Eiffel Tower. We took the elevator up to the middle section and had one of the most decadent dinners ever. I like sea food, but I can be a little picky, but that night, I had some of the best scallops I have ever had! It’s these dinners where a menu is preselected for me that I tend to enjoy the most. It forces me to try things I may not ordinarily order and the result is usually foodgasm. 

There’s been other nice day trips we’ve had since moving here. Like visiting the italian region of Switzerland. Seeing the palm trees transported me right back to California. Driving into Germany and seeing the Neuschwanstein Castle not once, but twice. Heck, we even took a trip with the pup and drove into Liechtenstein. Yup, went from one end of the country to the other on that one main road. *chuckles* 

So 2011 was an exciting year for travel and food. 2012 can only get better. There’s a trip just over the horizon for London. Watch out England! Who knows where we will be going for our 3rd wedding anniversary?!? A trip back into Italy is probably in our future too…will it be Rome or Venice or both? I’d love to go to Spain. I’d love to visit Greece. A short cruise in the Mediterranean sounds perfect, no? 

*Rolls up my sleeves* Watch out 2012… here I come!

© At Longing’s End  

new year, new me

Hi! It’s me, Mina. 2011 has been a whirlwind. The 31st marks two significant changes in my life. December 31st of 2008 was the day Sylvanus proposed marriage to me. Saying yes was one of the smartest decisions of my life. December 31st of 2010 was the day he and I started a new life in Switzerland. Here we are, one year after that move.

To say that I love it here in Switzerland would be an outright lie. To say I hate it here would also be a lie. I’m somewhere in the middle. Yes, it’s difficult living somewhere you don’t speak the language. However, there is an alarming amount of people who do speak english. It’s a give or take situation. It sucks not being able to speak to my neighbors, read the local paper or read notices on the apartment walls. On the other hand, I’m not doing so bad, I suppose. I’m taking lessons and slowly learning German, but even once that is accomplished, Swiss German is a whole other language to learn. I’ve made a few friends through my class which isn’t so bad either.

So, there are things about Switzerland I do love. They are so animal friendly here. Owning a dog is great. I can take her anywhere I want, including inside restaurants. This country is beautiful and quiet and small. Not to mention, I am smack in the middle of Europe and getting anywhere is pretty easy. But, there is so much about Switzerland that is not America and that, I miss. Cheap prices and stores being open all the time are the things I miss most. Oh and being in a country where I speak the language is nice too. I know that I would probably feel much different if we moved to the french region of switzerland (the much better region in my opinion), but that is not a possibility. Maybe once I have mastered German, but I feel like that’s still a year or so away as well.

Well, I guess I should stop pretending I don’t see the large pachyderm in the room. Yes, 2011 brought an amazing change to my life. I met C. I met C, we hit it off, fireworks erupted and then the car crashed. I’m not going to go on and on about our relationship and then our break up. It’s all written on this blog if you are reading this and are confused. (Just go here).

There was a lesson to be learned here though. I gave my heart to someone who couldn’t really be trusted with it. I’ll never make this mistake again. My want, desire and need (even selfishness) to be with C made me ignore the fact that he couldn’t tell his primary partner how he really felt about me. I’m not going to begin to debate whether or not she really knew I existed. He told me she knew, I’m taking his word for it. She however, could never know that he fell in love with me. In the end, this was our doom. He chose his life over me, because I couldn’t be included in his life. That’s the way the cookie crumbles.

I actually feel a little sorry for him. Well, besides the fact he gave up the very best slave he is ever going to have, he has to go through our break up alone. I had my husband by my side, supporting me, and holding me when the tears would not stop. He, however, only has himself. Or maybe he’s not really going through any pain at all. Who knows? He’s at least done me the favor of not contacting me since the day I said it had to end because I refused to be his recreational activity.

I’m never going to understand how or why he chose to turn his back on us… oh well… it just is. Time to move on.

My break up with C brings in a lot of new changes for me for the new year. It’s hard to say what the new year will bring for me. I’m pretty bitter and hurt right now. I have no interest in moving on with someone else. I have no interest in getting involved with someone seriously. Right now… it’s all bull shit to me. D/s, polyamory… bullshit. Just call me “cold hearted bitch”. Or “bitter bitch” works as well. Maybe one day, when I can be happy with seeing people on a recreational basis (meaning no relationships and no emotions involved), be it D/s or just sex, I’ll jump back into the game. But, that is not my interest and I am certainly NOT ready to get involved with someone right now.

I’m not fool enough to tell you I am never going to fall in love with another person again, for I can’t control my heart, but I am going to try my hardest. My break up with C has left me completely untrusting. I don’t want to fall in love again.

Also, awhile ago, I wrote a post about not wanting to be involved with people who would be cheating on their significant other in order to see me. Mind you, that was NOT a post judging people because they cheat! I don’t care what people do in their own relationships. That is their business. It was simply stating that people who are not “free” to see me, can’t really be available to me. Also, I didn’t feel great being the “other woman”. Well… all that is changing this coming year.

It is not my business nor responsibility to be in charge of another couples’ relationship. If a man, or woman, chooses to see me in secrecy from their significant other, so be it. Call me a hypocrite. I don’t care. I think I’m entitled to change my mind how I wish to conduct my life. If I’m willing to run the risk of being involved when a person’s significant other finds out I exist, then I’m grown up enough to be involved with them. I’m choosing to no longer make someone’s choice to see me in secrecy, be a no-go. It doesn’t mean I WILL see someone who is making me their dirty little secret, it just means I no longer will say “NO” immediately.

So there you have it. A new year, with hopefully a new me. Maybe not a better me, but right now, I don’t give a fuck. I don’t want to get emotionally involved with anyone for a very long time. D/s? Hah.. I’m pretty sure that’s over for me. I’m certainly not ready to go back to that world. Maybe it’s time I focus on only being involved with women, but for sure, any men I get involved with, will be no strings attached, which, for a lot of men, works just fine for them, preferred even.

I don’t know what I want this coming year, but I figure, burning the bridge of 2011 after I’ve crossed it, is a pretty damn good idea.

© At Longings End

HNT- Finale

I took this photo weeks ago during my photo shoot for the HNT finale project. When HNT first came into my blogging life a few years ago, it was a wonderful community to be a part of. As the years passed and my life changed, I found my participation growing thin. These days, I seem to be an HNT participant once in a blue moon. I’m sad to see it go, but can see that all things eventually come to an end. Here is my final HNT hoorah! If you’ve missed any of my HNTs, you can find them in our gallery! 

And don’t forget to visit me and the other HNT participants in the finale project! 

Product Review: PicoBong IPO Finger Vibe

Today’s review is brought to you by the lovely people of PicoBong. Who the  heck is PicoBong you ask? Well, from the team behind the company you may already know as LELO, comes this new company, PicoBong! Why a new company? Glad you asked! “The new PicoBong brand builds on [Lelo's] extensive experience and knowledge of creating high quality, sophisticated products, [and] applying this ethic to a younger clientele at a more affordable price point.” The biggest “complaint” that I hear from most people about Lelo, is that it is a little out of their price range. So why not create a company with a line of products that give you a fresher  style and quality, but at a more affordable price?  Today, I will be reviewing the PicoBong IPO Finger Vibe for you. 

“Ipo is a cute little finger vibe that lets users focus vibrations where they are wanted most, turning every touch, tickle, and stroke into a singular sensation.”

IPO is made with body safe, FDA approved silicone and ABS plastic and is fully waterproof. Like Lelo products, IPO features a powerful and near silent motor with 12 different vibrating patterns and speeds. The controls are user friendly and easily accessible. I had a lot of fun giving IPO a test drive.  IPO runs on one AAA battery and you get about 2 hours of playtime with one battery. I first got myself familiar with the controls and how to change the vibrating patterns. There are only two buttons on IPO, a + and a -. One will increase the speed (+) and one will decrease the speed (-). Also holding + turns IPO on and holding – turns IPO off. If you hold + for 2 seconds and release, it will change the vibrating pattern. At first, I didn’t get this to work. Turns out, it’s a little longer than 2 seconds, but once I realized the trick, I was switching between modes easily. 

view of ring

Another thing I noticed about IPO was the silicone ring designed to slip your finger through. I am a small woman and have small hands with small fingers. Even for me, slipping IPO over my finger was quite snug. Sylvanus, my husband, is a tall man and has much bigger hands with thicker fingers than I do. I asked him to try and put IPO on his finger. He was able to do so, but it was a very tight fit for him.

Now comes the fun part! I decided I was going to take my time and fully enjoy the IPO. I got undressed and laid back on the bed and turned IPO on. Immediately the vibrations began stimulating my clit in a wonderful way. IPO’s smooth silicone felt very nice against my tender flesh. It fits just right on my finger for perfect placement.

easy to use controls

I found the controls easily accessible with my thumb. One by one I went through all of the different vibrating patterns. Each one stimulating me in a different way. Some if them worked better than others. The last few patterns are a mix of pulsing vibrations and rising and falling intensity. It’s like a playground for your clit. I ended up staying on one of these patterns and rode it out to a shattering orgasm. 

Would I recommend the PicoBong IPO Finger Vibe? Yes, I would, but not at 100%. It’s a quality product at an affordable price. It can be used alone, or with a partner or more. Being fully water proof also adds more possibilities to it’s uses. There is one thing that does concern me about IPO however,

finger turning blue

and that is the tightness of the ring you slip your finger through. I have no idea if silicone “loosens” up the more you use it, but that ring is a little too snug. Sure, it fit my finger just fine, but I have small fingers.What about someone else with thicker fingers? Also, after about 10-15 minutes of wearing and using the vibe, I noticed that the tip of my finger was getting blue from the ring being tight. 

Visit the PicoBong site to find IPO and various other products you might be interested in! 

Product Review: Crystal Delights Crystal Twist Mini Plug

Now for something with a little… twist! This review is brought to you by the fabulous people of Crystal Delights. When I won their twitter contest for the CAC Plug, they asked me if I would like to write a review for their Crystal Twist Mini Plug. I took one look at it and said, “YES!” My thoughts were immediately that this would be an awesome anal toy to have MasterC use on me. Sadly, however, this will never happen, but I still had fun using it on myself! 

“You haven’t experienced anal play until you’ve experienced the sensation of our Crystal Twist mini-plug. Made of smooth, clear glass and topped with a stunning crystal Swarovski element, this corkscrew-shaped plug slips in surprisingly easily. The unique shape and beautiful crystal will leave you feeling exquisite inside and outside.”

I have to say, I was quite curious about how a twisted plug would feel. I had no idea if it would be pleasurable or uncomfortable. Well, I can tell you, it is quite pleasurable. A very different sensation than having a “normal” plug inserted, but very nice! It did slip surprisingly easily into my anus. I then wondered, could I sit comfortably or walk around with this plug inserted? I kind of assumed it would be a “for play” only kind of plug. Again, I was surprised. I could sit down comfortably and walk around with this lovely plug inserted. I wouldn’t say it would be a plug I would leave the house with while wearing, but it is nice knowing I can wear it and still walk around my home in, or sit down with my laptop. 

Specifications (all specifications are approximate)

• Length: 4.7 (inches)
• Insertable Length: 4.2 (inches)
• Width: 1.4 (inches)
• Weight: 3.6 (ounces)

Now, came the fun part! I started by slowly pulling and pushing the Twist back and forth, eventually letting it pop out of my anus. I started twisting the corkscrew plug inside me. I had to know if it would be uncomfortable. It felt very different, a little strange at first. The more I played with my anus however, the looser it got. I found that the plug would naturally twist in and out of my ass as I pushed and pulled. I began fucking my anus with the Twist faster and I reached for a finger vibe to stimulate my clit. I had a fluttering orgasm while fucking my ass with the Twist. 

The Crystal Twist, in my opinion, makes an excellent plug for D/s couples. It’s unique shape makes for very unique sensation play. I wouldn’t limit it to the D/s world though. This is most definitely a plug for anal play among people of all kinks or non kinks. I think it’s best used on someone by someone. Of course, I did have a lot of fun with it on my own, so I wouldn’t say that’s a terrible idea. *wink* I just recognize that this is most definitely a plug that could make for great anal play when used with more than one person.  

Because the Twist is made of pyrex glass, it is easily cleaned with soap and water. However, just recognize that a little extra attention is needed when cleaning this toy due to the corkscrew shape. It is not, however, more difficult to clean. Also, because of it’s corkscrew shape, just realize that more *ahem* air will be traveling into the anus as you thrust in and out. 

Would I recommend the Crystal Twist Mini Plug to someone looking for something more than the average plug? Heck yeah I would! It’s unique shape and design makes for wonderful sensations. Plus the pretty Swarovski elements (available in 8 colors), tops it all off. Interested in getting one of your own? Get a Crystal Mini Plug here. Or maybe you’re looking for something different?

 

The Zones of Celebrity

And now for something completely different…

Okay, before you start mocking me, I admit, i have my vices – bad reality TV is one of them. After this last seasons of America’s Next Top Model (cycle 17 – the All Star cycle!) where I watched Tyra go on a mission to deprive every single one of the former contestants of every last shred of dignity they ever had, I finally snapped on the episode where they had to make music videos, interspersed with Tyra and YouTube sensation Keenan Cahill acting like idiots. (I really thought they had hid rock bottom when she tried to coin “smile” as a word, but leave to The Tyra to find a way to sink lower.) And, I think, that moment, where she was teaching her contestants to feel lucky to have Keenan Cahill in their videos, she showed them how low they really are on the celebrity pecking order. How low is that? Well, let me show you, with…ta-da! my List of the fourteen Zones of celebrity!

15. The YouTube Sensation Zone

Keenan Cahill, Ray William Johnson, OK GO, Judson Laipply, and Antoine Dodson. Go ahead…look them up. :-) The point is…you are on YouTube, and a small group of secret-handshaking people across the internet have heard of you, but every time they introduce you on TV they have to explain who you are and what you did.

14. The Clark Howard Zone

Think of your basic guy on local radio, maybe a comedian in your town, perhaps a college athlete. Somehow or another they blow up and they wind with a national gig of absolutely no importance whatsoever, but people are rooting for them because they are from THEIR town. And maybe, just maybe, someone from across the country will go, “Yeah, that guy. He’s from your town?”

13. The “On a show with Dr. Drew” Zone

You are cast in a show that in includes the word “celebrity” or “star.” e.g. Dancing with the Stars, Celebrity Rehab, Celebrity Apprentice. This is either your career’s last gasp, or a desperate lunge for stardom. Once again, you are still being introduced by what you were once known for, and you are either on your way to obscurity/the grave, or you are hoping to be such an incredibly transfixing train wreck that turns to glory that maybe, just maybe, your star will be invigorated. Being on Dancing With The Stars is automatic membership here. 

12. The Richard Hatch Zone

This is obvious – you made an especially memorable turn on a reality show. Think Omarosa, Jet and Cord McCoy, or Marcel Vigneron. You were either really good, really lovable, or really awful. And now no one can forget you…but no one can really think of another use for you either. So we all know your name, but there is absolutely nothing you can do to further your career apart from guest appearances again on the show, where you will be introduced by “Winner of the first season of Survivor, Richard Hatch!”

11. The Dr. Drew Zone 

You are a meta-celebrity. You aren’t really famous, yourself, but you are always there, interacting with celebrities. You’re a stopping point in people’s career. Other examples of this include Jay Leno, Tom Bergeron, and Jeff Probst. On one hand, you are well-known, everyone has heard of you, but on the other hand you’ve installed a glass ceiling over yourself. It’s good money, even if it’s not going to make you famous. It’s a parasitic sort of fame, but it’s legit.

10. The Chesley “Sully” Sullenberger Zone* (this Zone to be renamed biannually)

This is the zone for the small-time hero. Someone who has one moment in the sun, gets to be on the late-night punch lines for a little while, maybe a cover of Parade or People Magazine, and then inevitably gets a book deal which go to about #5 on the New York Times bestseller list (mainly because of readers of Parade), and a segment on The Daily Show to hawk the book, and, finally a 20/20 interview. Then you fade into obscurity, ultimately landing on a Trivial Pursuit card. 

9. The Michael Johnson Zone

The is especially for Olympic Athletes – people who are brilliant and dedicate their lives to something we only notice once every four years, like Track and Field or Curling. This is where is NBC’s wizardry at creating a twenty minute segment showing how you overcome polio to become a potential silver-medalist at archery is truly amazing – and where cable television has all but destroyed this category. (Pop Quiz: Who was Michael Johnson? Hint: Gold shoes.)

8. The Ted Kennedy Zone

You are the second/third act of the political family, less glorious than the others, but still noted in your own right  - though usually by the ways that you don’t measure up to the other carriers of your last name. Dan Quayle, Al Gore Jr., George W. Bush, and Mitt Romney (for now) fit this category.

7. The Jamie and Adam Zone

You’re a cult hit, but just big enough that people start to know who you are, though they sometimes need a little help. You are right on the edge of bursting out of your bubble, and anything could be THE thing. Think Jane Lynch pre-Glee.  Of course, this is the difficult plateau. A few wrong steps reaching out for the Big Time, and you’re Joss Whedon. 

6. The Kardashian Zone

You are famous, and no one knows why, and yet, somehow, we accept this. All of us. Everyone knows who you are, but no one quite knows why they do. Also “famous for being famous.” Granted, you might have helped yourself with a sex tape, banging someone higher on the list than yourself, or letting some naked pictures get out. Or, you just had a name like “Snooki” that made people ask, “Who the fuck is Snooki?” We are starting to get into some rarefied territory here – this is a zone people can sustain for a while, and even parlay into some real money. Just don’t forget to have something juicy “get out” every now and then so that you are a splinter in the social consciousness.

5. The Jennifer Lopez Zone

This is a very delicate place. You have been good at something, and now you try and step out into another part of the world. In poker terms, you are going all-in. Take Jennifer Lopez – a dancer from In Living Color, a surprisingly promising actress (after her turns in Selena and Out of Sight), and then tries to branch into music. While she did relatively well in music (compared to, say, Eddie Murphy’s Party All The Time), suddenly she was that singer who occasionally acted, and then, after a short stint of some bad decisions (Puffy/Affleck, “Jenny from the Block,” Gigli) she wasn’t good at anything. Compare to say, Oscar Winner Jamie Foxx, who has people saying “He used to be a stand up comedian?” or Mark Wahlberg (a.k.a. Marky Mark, remember?). An interesting case in all this is Justin Timberlake – his acting to date has been “serviceable” but he hasn’t really stretched himself, either. He is one Garry Marshall movie away from throwing his acting career permanently into second gear. (see: Cool J, L.L.) 

4. The Michael Jordan Zone

Now we are in the big time. This is reserved for crossover big-time athletes – the ones that people who aren’t sports fan know. The genius of this zone: you are now bulletproof. If you go on Saturday Night Live and just stink it up with wooden performances (*cough*Joe Montana*cough*), no one cares. You aren’t supposed to be good. And if you are even “less than awful” people suddenly start casting you in extra roles in movies. It’s really brilliant. The only way out is to start stinking at your sport, or run a dog fighting ring…

3. The John F. Kennedy Zone

The is political famous. You are a major politician, you have real, change-the-world power. People talk about you. The only downside to this zone: lose an election, and you immediately fall ten zones down the list. Hit a term limit, and that fall comes even sooner. Even the most publicly active of former Presidents, Jimmy Carter, barely gets mentioned. (presumably, with his wife as Secretary of State and traveling a lot, Bill Clinton is the most privately active.) But that time in the spotlight, you are unbeatable – you are always famous, always talked about. There is only the short shelf life holding you back. 

2. The OJ Zone

This is nasty. Now, suddenly, no one needs to explain who you are; we all know, we just wish we didn’t. Your name is enough. You are punch line fodder possibly forever. As I run the names off, just think of the grim nods you are making: Gary Busey, Bobby Brown, Amy Winehouse, Charlie Sheen, Mike Tyson. When Ari Gold on Entourage says “He will not go Dave Chapelle on you,”  you know you have reached this zone. Something terrible has happened, your name is now a cautionary tale of talent gone spectacularly awry. Lindsay Lohan, Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, Joe Namath. Let’s move on.

1. The Oprah Zone

Simple. People refer to you by the shortest possible name because saying anything else feels trite. When explaining who you are is redundant…that it is the pinnacle. Will Smith, Gaga, Clooney, Madonna…You know it when you see it, no one has to tell you.